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What's a girlfriend to do?

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  • What's a girlfriend to do?

    A few days ago, my boyfriend told me that he found a lump in one of his testicles. He said he thought he felt something a while ago, but thought it was nothing. He's a really busy guy, constantly working long hours, and has "no time to be sick". We live five hours apart right now so I feel really helpless.
    There are other things in his life stressing him out as well, pretty big issues I need not mention here, but will simply say none of which are health related. Since he told me, I've been doing research online. What's got me worried is that recently he's also been complaining a lot about lower back pain, a symptom I've read about. I told him to go to the doctor as soon as possible, and he agreed to go on Thursday (he told me about the lump on Sunday). I don't want to be pesky, and maybe I want ease of mind for myself. With him stressed about other things in his life, and now this, how do I bring it up without overwhelming him? How do I support him? Should I pretend that everything is normal? I know that he would be extremely devastated to lose a testicle. He would make a huge deal out of it, while I just want him to be healthy. What's the best way to offer support?

    He hasn't been diagnosed yet. I don't want to be making him worry more than he should be. I've told him it's probably nothing, but he's let himself believe that it's cancer. What are the chances that it's a cyst?

    Okay, I'm rambling... just concerned. Overwhelmed myself.


  • #2
    Don't get ahead of yourself. Odds are that it is a cyst and he will be fine. The lower back pain is probably nothing even though it can be symptomatic. Just try and make sure he keeps his doctor's appointment.
    Son Jason diagnosed 4/30/04, stage III. Right I/O 4/30/04. Graduated College 5/13/04. 4XEP 6/7/04 - 8/13/04. Full open RPLND 10/13/04. All Clear since.

    Treated by Dr. Rakowski of Midland Park, NJ. Visited Sloan Kettering for protocol advice. RPLND done at Sloan Kettering.


    • #3
      Sacrificing a testicle in exchange for a long life isn't such a bad deal, but it's one he very likely won't have to take. I agree with dadmo to focus on getting the doctor's diagnosis for now.
      right inguinal orchiectomy 6/5/2003 > nonseminoma, stage I > surveillance > L-RPLND 6/24/2005 for recurrence, suspected teratoma but found seminoma, stage II > chylous ascites until 9/2005 > surveillance and "all clear" since

      Your donation funds Livestrong services for people facing cancer now. Please sponsor my ride!


      • #4

        you're right. i probably am... thnx


        • #5
          "What a gf got to do?". W/ or w/o TC: challenge him to the max! You go, gal!

          Originally posted by his_GF
          you're right. i probably am... thnx


          • #6
            when I hear that they have to remove testicle due to cancer
            I didn't think a second for the surgery or loosing it, but about what wil happen after that and my chances of survival

            so you can tell him this is a very treatable cancer, involve him in treatment plan and help him read

            good luck
            diagnose 18 Aug 06
            Orchiectomy 24 Aug 06
            pure Seminoma, markers normal, PALP positive
            CT 35x45x60 mm at L3
            EPx4 cycle from 6 Oct 2006
            CT no shrinkage after 4 cycle, PET negative 12 Jan 07
            Post chemo mass resection 14 Feb 07
            Found mature teratoma (unusual for seminoma)
            Surveillance !


            • #7
              man these threads are pretty old lol..

              but seeing how you are young, I assume he is around the same age as you give or take a few. Alls I can tell ya is to support him in anyway possible. It sucks but if you have someone there with ya it makes it alot better.
              the youngin'


              • #8
                Just being there is a lot

                I would suggest like the other guys here.
                Just make sure he go's to check it out and be there for him If he wants to talk about it. he'll let you know.
                But it's likely nothing to worry about.