Nice to meet you!

[dadmo]

Jenny:
Clinical trials serve an important part in the treatment of cancer and I commend you for considering one but don't give up on proven treatments. Unless I'm missing something you should have full faith that BEP will work.

[Margaret]

Jenny, it is difficult to know how to support someone you love when they are faced with cancer. I am sure just trying to figure out your own feelings is hard enough. Just love him all you can, allow him to express his feelings, and try not to look too far down the road. Take today, and work out what needs to be done. Don't burden yourself with thinking about the next 2 months. It sounds cliche I know, but the 'one day at a time' thing does help.

Try not to allow yourself to get into the dreaded "what if" cycle. I started that early on and I will be the first to tell you, it does nothing but create more anxiety. I would say "what if the chemo doesn't work", "what if the numbers don't go down"...and I got to the point where I was telling myself..."of course the numbers will go down", "of course the chemo will work"...I would look only at the positive and I would not allow our friends or family to say anything else in front of us. Come here as much as you need to...we understand and maybe we can help when you have questions.

Your husband sounds like he is getting great care!!!

Thinking many happy and positive thoughts for you!

Margaret

[Lori]

Jenny, this time of the cancer journey pretty much stinks. Everything is an unknown, there is no plan you can wrap yourselves around, your trying to figure out your own feelings but at the same time be the end all be all for your husband. I remember it as if it was yesterday. Margaret provides some great advice. The only think I can offer is please take time for yourself. Your going to be completely wrapped up in your husband and you should be, but you need to also look after yourself so you can be all your husband needs you to be.

Your husband probably doesn't know what he needs from you either, but you'll read his cues and go from there.

Thinking happy healing thoughts.

Lori

[Mom]

Jenny, I am a control freak and my husband's cancer was out of my control. The only way I coped was to think of the worst, determine how I was going to handle it, form a plan for me and my five year old child, and once that was done I concentrated on him. That was 27 years ago. My husband recovered and has done well. However, it was a wake up call for me and I followed through with part of my plan (went back to school) and turned lemons into lemonade. Take care of yourself so you can take care of him. No one knows what tomorrow will bring but you have to be ready for it. Dianne

[petep]

jennyp...

just reading up on your thread...I hope all is well.

pete

[dannysbrother]

hey pete, glad you posted. I don't know how I missed the activity on this thread in the middle of last month, but I just caught up the posts too.

Jenny,

How are you? I'm thinking about you and Mike. Hoping that things are improving. Just know that you can always post your feelings, thoughts, questions or anything at all here. Looking forward to hearing the latest.

Mikey

[JennyP]

update

We spent several days in the hospital because Mike's whites dropped to .3 and he had a fever in the middle of the 3rd week of chemo. They let him out on his 30th birthday when he was at 3.4, and now he's up to 8.

The hospital trip was a huge blow emotionally to Mike, and he wouldn't/couldn't stop thinking and talking about death, specifically his own. It was terrifying. I couldn't find any way to comfort him. Lucky for us, his parents and brother came to visit for a couple weeks, and that has made all the difference in the world. His mom survived thyroid cancer and has been in remission for about 8 years. His brother is around 6 years past testicular cancer.

We just started the 4th week of chemo, where he gets it 5 days in a row. After the first week, the lump on Mike's neck (only one you can see from the outside) shrunk visibly, and now you can only feel it if you know what you're looking for. It was 4 cm. I'm holding on tight to that, even though the doc didn't get excited over it.

I intended to write more today but Mike needs me. I'll try to post some labs for your opinions later.

Thank you all for being here, and I hope you're all as well as possible.

[Karen]

Jenny,
I'm sorry that Mike has such a hard time, especially emotionally, with the chemo. Any more AFP results? Hang tight through this round and keep us posted.

[Fed]

They let him out on his 30th birthday when he was at 3.4, and now he's up to 8.
[...]
Lucky for us, his parents and brother came to visit for a couple weeks, and that has made all the difference in the world. His mom survived thyroid cancer and has been in remission for about 8 years. His brother is around 6 years past testicular cancer.
[...]
After the first week, the lump on Mike's neck (only one you can see from the outside) shrunk visibly, and now you can only feel it if you know what you're looking for. It was 4 cm.

Jenny,
You may notice that I pared down your quoted post here. I'm focusing on the good stuff: the WBC going up, the reassuring visit from Mike's parents, and the reduction in size of the neck met.
I can understand how overwhelming this must be for you, Mike, and the family. The good thing is that you are trying to hold strong as best as you can. I remember your post being a little over a month ago, and look at how far things have come along in such a short period of time. Mike is understandibly emotionally drained, but he's all the better by having you by his side .
Let us know of any updates. We're here for you.

[mercyriver]

I agree with Fed, there is a lot of great news there! And how wonderful your husband has you and his family, what a great support you all must be!

Hang in there, lots of postive thoughts and prayers coming your way.

Becki

[TCLEFT]

Hang in Jenny. Wishing you all the best.

[Margaret]

Jenny, you sound like you are really a great source of support for him. Hang in there!!!

[Adrr-Atta]

Hi Jenny.
I just finished reading your posts. I also had stage 3 mixed non-seminoma. It took about a year to get rid of the beast and I've been cancer free for 8 months now ! I work, live normally. I almost forgot about cancer and treatments.

Hang in there and never give up!!!