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High School Senior Just Diagnosed

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  • High School Senior Just Diagnosed

    Hello. My 17 year old son was just diagnosed 12/23. The health care system has worked like a Swiss clock. PCP visit 12/22, Ultrasound 12/22, Urologist consult 12/23, Orchiectomy 12/27, CT 12/29 Surgeon F/U 1/5, Oncologist appointment 1/5 and 2nd opinions at IU on 1/10. Results: stage 1 non-seminomas (no treatment plan, yet). Information on the web has been enormously helpful, as has content on this forum. I'm in healthcare advertising/marketing, so accessing Journal articles, etc. has been relatively easy. At this point, I am most concerned about how my son is processing/coping with the diagnosis. He is handling the diagnosis like a champ (good news) but he's not sharing his feelings (which is NOT like him). He gets irritated when I try to initiate conversations. I think information is power - but I'm having a hard time getting through to him. Any young guys or parents out there who can give this mom some advice?

  • #2
    Welcome to the forum and good luck with your sons treatrment. I think you will find most of the younger guys unwilling to share their feelings. My son was diagnosed almost 2 years ago and he still rarely says anything about his situation. I know how much you want to comfort him but this is something he has to work through on his own. It's not easy to face your mortality at such a young age. Not to be crude but the one thing my son did talk about was how everthing powerful and desirable (from a male point of view) has balls, and now he didn't. He's over that now but it did bother him at first. Please keep us posted.
    Last edited by dadmo; 01-04-06, 09:17 AM.
    Son Jason diagnosed 4/30/04, stage III. Right I/O 4/30/04. Graduated College 5/13/04. 4XEP 6/7/04 - 8/13/04. Full open RPLND 10/13/04. All Clear since.

    Treated by Dr. Rakowski of Midland Park, NJ. Visited Sloan Kettering for protocol advice. RPLND done at Sloan Kettering.


    • #3
      first, i want to say our thoughts and prayers are with you, your son and family! i'm not sure of how your son will deal with this as though i am 32 years of age. i found that it really helped me deal with everything by being knowledgable of what was taken place. he may not want to express his feelings but i expect by becoming more aware of whats happening and that things will be alright....and they will, he will open up more. i'm sure there are alot of things he is worried about self consciously about the orchiectomy that he just isnt comfortable talking about right now. just give it time and stay positive. keep us posted and dont hesitate to ask questions. there are alot of great people here and willing to help! i wish i would have found this forum sooner than i did but its great now! best of luck, Brian.
      diagnosed 01/15/2005 bi-lateral seminoma stage IIa,4cm lymph node, right I/O & partial left I/O mar/2005, 18 days of radiation, remaining left I/O- aug/2005, surveillance, Wife did IVF oct/2005, DAD OF BABY GIRL born 08-02-2006!!! testosterone implants May 2008


      • #4
        Hang in there. I think your son will eventually begin to open up more. He's probably still in a state of shock from the whole ordeal. He might also not want to cause you any additional stress by talking to you about it. I've seen a lot of men go to great lenght to protect the people they care about. Is there anyone outside the immediate family he could talk to? Sometimes this is easier. After my second TC diagnosis, I started seeing a psyciatrist, and I feel a lot less guilty venting my frustrations at her than at my wife. She also told me that many cancer patients she sees suffer from post-traumatic stress syndrome. Now, I know it may be difficult to get a young guy to go to a counselor, but keep it in mind if your son stays withdrawn. I'm willing to bet things will get better once a treatment plan is in place. Sometimes not knowing what will happen is the worst.

        My thoughts and prayers are with you both.
        Things will get better.

        Right I/O 4/22/1988
        RPLND 6/20/1988
        Left I/O 9/17/2003

        Tho' much is taken, much abides; and though we are not now that strength which in old days moved earth and heaven; that which we are, we are; one equal temper of heroic hearts, made weak by time and fate, but strong in will; to strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.