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  • A bit embarassed to ask this, but........

    Have any of you had an "out of no where" emotional sneak attack. For some reason I can't explain I completely lost it last night. Without going into the details, I basically broke down emotionally. I'm reasonably sure this isn't a Testosterone issue. My Sister is a Survivor as well and says it's probably the healthiest thing I've done since all of this. So why don't I feel any better? And when the H*ll am I going to be caught off guard like that again? I'd really like your input. I do feel better when you folks talk to me. Maybe the breakdown was a trigger to talk to you all. Don't know. Fill me in if you can.
    Thanks
    I Love My Pack!

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  • #2
    It's probably like anything tough that happens in life and that affects you. You may be doing ok but all these feelings and emotions are going on that you may not be aware of or not really dealt with before or you thought you had dealt with them and they still come in full force. Then all of a sudden, it's like a waterfall and it sneaks out of nowhere and bowls you over.


    Patti

    Originally posted by TCLEFT
    Have any of you had an "out of no where" emotional sneak attack. For some reason I can't explain I completely lost it last night. Without going into the details, I basically broke down emotionally. I'm reasonably sure this isn't a Testosterone issue. My Sister is a Survivor as well and says it's probably the healthiest thing I've done since all of this. So why don't I feel any better? And when the H*ll am I going to be caught off guard like that again? I'd really like your input. I do feel better when you folks talk to me. Maybe the breakdown was a trigger to talk to you all. Don't know. Fill me in if you can.
    Thanks
    Wife of Kevin Murphy
    Diagnosed 7/16/04 100% Choriocarcinoma
    Oriechtomy 7/20/04
    4xBEP 8/04-11/04 BHCG:1200 (lung only)
    Rediagnosed 12/27/04 BHCG: 50
    1xVIP 1/05 (lung)
    HDC/Stem cell Indiana 2/05-4/05 BHCG: 51-4.5 (lung)
    HDC failure 5/05
    3xGemzar/Taxol 6/05-9/05 (lung only)
    VP-16 w/Avastin 9/05-1/06 (lung only)
    Cyberknife 5" lung tumor 2/06
    cyberknife 6 brain tumors 3/06
    1xOxaliplatnin 3/06 (liver, lungs, kidneys, left hip)
    Passed away 4/13/2006

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    • #3
      I know for me During my treatment ect. All i did was talk about it with my partner , friends & family . I talked about it and talked about and talked some more about it .. i am lucky , i have / had amazing support through my battle with TC ..
      talking about it and get it out in the open , best thing i can recommend .

      PS . i watched a classic film last night "it's a wonderful life " with Jimmy stewart and i found myself a bit more emotional that i ever have been before and it feels good !


      Cheers T
      My experience .
      Metastasis tumor 18cm x 8cm
      Orchiectomy 2006/06/12
      4xBEP 2006/06/26-2006/08/28
      RPLND 2006/10/12
      Life is too short , Take charge today , Be strong & Live strong .

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      • #4
        My wife lost her Mother, Father, and Brother to Cancer. I think I was actually consoling her during my treatment. I think after losing everyone close to her, she might have lost track that I was still breathing. I also had to be strong for my kids. Except for my Sister, I really don't have anyone I can talk to. That being said, I think I'm answering my own question.
        I Love My Pack!

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        • #5
          Originally posted by TCLEFT
          I really don't have anyone I can talk to.
          I am here you can talk to me .
          CHeers T
          My experience .
          Metastasis tumor 18cm x 8cm
          Orchiectomy 2006/06/12
          4xBEP 2006/06/26-2006/08/28
          RPLND 2006/10/12
          Life is too short , Take charge today , Be strong & Live strong .

          Comment


          • #6
            Much appreciated. Strange, now that it's been put to me, I just don't know what to say. Doesn't help, I don't type either. Between last night and today, I just have the feeling of being "out of sorts". Hopefully, the Weekend will help to remedy this. We'll see. Thanks again Tim.
            I Love My Pack!

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            • #7
              How are you sure it wasnt an E2(estrogen/testosterone ratio) issue? What makes me suspicious is you say "out of nowhere" so there wasnt a trigger?

              I have been through afew emotional times and crying was never out of nowhere, it was always routine or triggered. Although everyone is diffrent, If I was you I would get E2 tested, might sound stupid but you have had a major change to your hormone system and an imbalance can cause this, even if you were tested after treatment, you never know when your testicle says enough is enough from elevated LH.

              What I suggest is to see a psychologist so you can speak to them.
              Find a good one, not one who just nods and says "and how does that make you feel"

              If talking to the psychologist doesnt make you feel better, find a new one.

              If you are depressed try fish oil.

              I have been through afew things that have made me become emotional, boarding school, relationship etc You do get over it.

              Whats worrying me is I havent cried yet not once and that makes me want to see a psychologist more cause its not like me. Maybe you are starting to put this all behind you.
              Last edited by Michael112; 12-01-06, 03:34 PM.
              Aged 23 ;; 09/06 left I/O ;; Markers normal ;; 100% Seminoma Stage 1. ;; 10x8x16mm & 7x7x8mm ;; rete testis invasion. ;; no vascular invasion. ;; surveillance. ;; HRT.

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              • #8
                I appreciate your concern. I haven't explored all of the appropriate testing. I'm presently just going on the fact that I'm functioning just as before. I haven't lost strength or muscle mass either. The only situation I have at present is neuropathy. My Sister and I are similar souls and we have a tendency to bottle things up. The more I reflect on this, the more I think it's strictly emotional rather than physiological. Can't quite explain, but I'm pretty sure this wasn't a hormonal mood swing, just some demons coming to visit. Might not be a bad idea to ask for tests at the next Dr's visit. He's pretty compliant to my requests. I don't feel the urgency to do this as yet, same for the Psych, but if things change, I will. And I hope you're right about this being put behind me, but I don't think that ever really happens 100%. Thanks Michael.
                I Love My Pack!

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                • #9
                  Probably you just suddenly realized how much you missed us!

                  In all seriousness, I bet the emotional release was good for you.
                  Scott
                  right inguinal orchiectomy 6/5/2003 > nonseminoma, stage I > surveillance > L-RPLND 6/24/2005 for recurrence, suspected teratoma but found seminoma, stage II > chylous ascites until 9/2005 > surveillance and "all clear" since

                  Your donation funds Livestrong services for people facing cancer now. Please sponsor my ride!

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                  • #10
                    TCLEFT:
                    At some point you just have to let it out. I know in my case I feel crummy for a bit after I post about a problem but in the long run this has been a great outlet for my frustration. Besides, you can't have a melt down, if you do who's gonna console me when I have mine?
                    Last edited by dadmo; 12-02-06, 06:23 AM.
                    Son Jason diagnosed 4/30/04, stage III. Right I/O 4/30/04. Graduated College 5/13/04. 4XEP 6/7/04 - 8/13/04. Full open RPLND 10/13/04. All Clear since.

                    Treated by Dr. Rakowski of Midland Park, NJ. Visited Sloan Kettering for protocol advice. RPLND done at Sloan Kettering.

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                    • #11
                      TCLEFT,
                      The bottle's gonna pop sometimes. It's good you have your sister to relate to emotionally. Your wife has lost very much, but maybe you need to let her know you need her to comfort you a bit now. We are here for you to vent about anything and everthing! Good luck.
                      Retired moderator. Husband, left I/O 16Dec2005, stage I seminoma with elevated b-HCG, no LVI, RTx15 (25Gy). All clear ever since.

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                      • #12
                        Probably you just suddenly realized how much you missed us!
                        How did you get so wise?
                        you can't have a melt down, if you do who's gonna console me when I have mine?
                        Well we can't go off at the same time. That just wouldn't be pretty.

                        Found my words to say to you All: Thank You!
                        I Love My Pack!

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by TCLEFT
                          How did you get so wise?
                          Now, do you mean wise as in "having the power of discerning and judging properly as to what is true or right," or wise as in "presumptuous or impertinent: Don't get wise with me, young man!"
                          Scott
                          right inguinal orchiectomy 6/5/2003 > nonseminoma, stage I > surveillance > L-RPLND 6/24/2005 for recurrence, suspected teratoma but found seminoma, stage II > chylous ascites until 9/2005 > surveillance and "all clear" since

                          Your donation funds Livestrong services for people facing cancer now. Please sponsor my ride!

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                          • #14
                            Well I used to think you were a Man of few words. And it ain't the age, it's the mileage. In any case, right on the first count, wrong on the second, and have more respect for your elders Sonny . You folks mean the world to me.
                            I Love My Pack!

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                            • #15
                              TCLEFT -

                              I think we have all had some sort of "out of nowhere" experience. A few months after my diagnosis, surgery and RT, a good friend of my wife's, a breast cancer survivor, asked me if I had cried yet. I said no and acted as if it was a silly thing. She insisted that I needed to let it out - that no matter what I thought I had suffered a big loss - not just my right one, but my whole life had been changed - eventhough I was going to be OK.

                              I did not understand at the time, but over the next few months I did experience some highs and lows, and my wife and I had some interesting arguements that ended in some tears and better understanding by both of us. My wife's friend was absolutely right, we do need to grieve our loss.

                              Of course, if it is a testosterone issue, it will probably continue. But I think it is probably healthy to have some sort of out of nowhere experience to let it out.
                              Right I/O 4/17/06, Seminoma Stage Ib
                              RT (15 days) completed 6/1/06
                              All clear as of 5/8/09

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