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so sorry to hear the news

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  • so sorry to hear the news

    I haven't posted since December as life has a way of swallowing you once you get busy. I did a search for Neals' sister to find out how things were going and found out he and another member had passed away. I am devastated for the both of you. Made me realize how lucky my husband has been in surviving this roller coaster of a journey. He was first diagnosed at stage IIIc nonseminoma. Went through a bunch of treatments including a tandem HDC which failed. Most recently he did have the Gem-Ox treatments but only 3 1/2 cycles. They had to stop because the side effects were outweighing any benefit. His tumor markers did normalize - so the Cleveland Clinic figures they at least bought him some time. Things were so bad at the time (just before they ended treatment) I was looking for a home nurse. My husband would go days without showering, eating, and even wet the bed a few times. yet after hitting rock bottom, he improved considerably approx 6 weeks after ending treatment and has been doing fairly well ever since. I'm not saying that he is cured (the tumors are stil there) but that his quality of life returned. We go back to the Cleveland Clinic on June 29 for a CT scan. I knew going in the odds of survival with this treatment (that he couldn't finish) are less than 20%, and have at this point resigned myself to the likely outcome - whether its this year or next or the one after that. While there is no expiration date on the bottoms of our feet, the reality is people do die no matter how much we love or care for them. I am not one to give up - and don't feel that I am - but would rather he LIVE what ever days are left than suffer through these guessing games. The old issue of quantity over quality. My heart sincerely goes out to all those who have suffered losses, and all those who continue to fight and worry about recurrance.

  • #2
    My god, I'm sitting here wondering how to reply to your thread shaking my head with tears in my eyes. I'm so sorry for what your husband and you have gone through. And amazed at both your will to do whatever it takes. He has gone through some nasty stuff. I've said it a million times and I'll say it a million more, I HATE CANCER. Prayers to you both.
    Brother Diag. 10/05 Non-Sem.
    Right I/O 11/05
    4XBEP 8/06
    RPLND 12/06
    2X VIP 1/22/07
    Only completed 1 Rd.


    • #3
      Good to hear from you have been in my thoughts. When I first joined this site it was you, Hopeful and Cellblock that my heart went out to. And now it is so many more, unfortunately. I'm glad you husband's quality of life has improved, but my God, how I wish this wasn't happening to you both!! You have shown your strength and I expect you'll keep that going forward. Please stay in touch if you can.
      Retired moderator. Husband, left I/O 16Dec2005, stage I seminoma with elevated b-HCG, no LVI, RTx15 (25Gy). All clear ever since.


      • #4
        killerjones -

        its 1am and I find myself on this have been an inspriration to so many people here with your outlook...thank you.

        - lump first noticed 11/20/2005
        - I/O right Dec 8, 2005
        - 95% embryonal / 5% seminoma
        - normal markers PRE surgery
        - no vascular invasion, tunica free of cancer, epididymis free of cancer, lungs free, lymph free
        - Stage I diagnosis
        - surveillance
        - mid feb '06, beta hcg slightly elevated = 4.6...small enlarged lower node seen on CT scan...
        - 3BEP began feb 20, 2006
        - finished 3 BEP, last bleo, april 17, 2006
        - CT scan, blood markers, chest..all clear
        - back on surveillance


        • #5
          Koller Jones...there are no words. You are amazing in everyway and I will pray that you and your husband find a way to beat this monster once and for all.
          Co-survivor with husband Boyce, Diagnosed 7-11-06, orchiectomy right testicle on 7-12-06- Stage 3A: Mixed germ cell tumor with inguinal seminomatous and kartotypic carcinoma. One tumor over 10 cm, second tumor 4 cm, Chemo 4xBEP: Bi-lateral RPLND Dec 2006, nerve sparing but left sterile.
          Current DVT
          Current testosterone replacement therapy, Testim.

          "You must abandon the life you planned, to live the life that was meant for you" ~wisdom I have learned from my family on this forum