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waiting for the sigh.
Thank you to everyone who posted. No doubt the vibes will be pouring in on Thursday!
I can feel the tension building right now leading up to this. It's a familiar feeling by now, but it seems to be magnified for all of us this time. I know why, and it doesn't give me any comfort.
This has just got to work. I believe it will.
You know, sometimes I look around and it is all so surreal. All of this. I noticed that yesterday was exactly 11 months since Danny was diagnosed. It's been literally non-stop since. One thing that none of us have been able to do since then is breathe a sigh of relief. I think you don't know how wonderful it is to breathe a good hard sigh of relief until you yearn to so badly and are prevented for so long. Instead, this uneasy feeling just builds in your chest and all you can do is try to be as at peace with it as you can and get to the next day.
I know when I'll be able to breathe that first good sigh and mean it and feel the release; When our family's plane touches down back in Phoenix and we pull up the our house that was abandoned back in November. It's a TOTAL mess (all of danny's stuff from his apartment AND all of my grandfather's stuff from his apartment are crammed throughout the house) but no matter the disaster area it may be, it will such a relief and symbolic victory to be back. I've already decided to go back with everyone and help get things re-settled for a few weeks before I come back to NYC. We'll move Danny back into his own apartment... and this time he will get to spend his first night there (He never got to when we moved him in the first time). We'll get my grandfather settled, although he will probably live with my parents now. And we'll get the house back in order.
These are the things I think about now. I think it's good for my sanity.
Oh, and before I go back to NYC I think I'll do something for myself. A short trip to Vegas is going to be inevitable. And I intend to put the Bellagio out of business!!!
Until then, the 'sigh' waits, still patiently... It'll come... Thursday will bring it closer...
-M
Thank you to everyone who posted. No doubt the vibes will be pouring in on Thursday!
I can feel the tension building right now leading up to this. It's a familiar feeling by now, but it seems to be magnified for all of us this time. I know why, and it doesn't give me any comfort.
This has just got to work. I believe it will.
You know, sometimes I look around and it is all so surreal. All of this. I noticed that yesterday was exactly 11 months since Danny was diagnosed. It's been literally non-stop since. One thing that none of us have been able to do since then is breathe a sigh of relief. I think you don't know how wonderful it is to breathe a good hard sigh of relief until you yearn to so badly and are prevented for so long. Instead, this uneasy feeling just builds in your chest and all you can do is try to be as at peace with it as you can and get to the next day.
I know when I'll be able to breathe that first good sigh and mean it and feel the release; When our family's plane touches down back in Phoenix and we pull up the our house that was abandoned back in November. It's a TOTAL mess (all of danny's stuff from his apartment AND all of my grandfather's stuff from his apartment are crammed throughout the house) but no matter the disaster area it may be, it will such a relief and symbolic victory to be back. I've already decided to go back with everyone and help get things re-settled for a few weeks before I come back to NYC. We'll move Danny back into his own apartment... and this time he will get to spend his first night there (He never got to when we moved him in the first time). We'll get my grandfather settled, although he will probably live with my parents now. And we'll get the house back in order.
These are the things I think about now. I think it's good for my sanity.
Oh, and before I go back to NYC I think I'll do something for myself. A short trip to Vegas is going to be inevitable. And I intend to put the Bellagio out of business!!!
Until then, the 'sigh' waits, still patiently... It'll come... Thursday will bring it closer...
-M
Thoughts and prayers are with you guys, Take care, Russell's Mom, Sharon
!!!)
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