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Hi all,
Sorry I haven't been in touch for quite a while; I have just arrived back from singapore after visiting with gerrard for 2 fabulous weeks......
Unfortunately gerrard lost use of his legs 2 weeks ago due to his tumour in his stomach (which is wrapped tightly around his spinal chord) growing and pressing on his sciatic nerve.....he has just finished 10 sessions of radiation and no longer needs a wheelchair to get around.....although he still needs a walking stick at the moment, his radio oncologist believes he should get about 90% of mobility back.....the doc said that the radiation will keep working for a further couple of weeks and is quite confident to see a drop in his hcg (currently at 300,000) over the next couple of weeks.....and should hold off on pallative chemo.....on the other hand his tc onc is saying he should really start pallative chemo straight away......so gerrard is feeling quite torn as what to do.....I told him only he could really make that decision and really feel for him in having to make such a hard decision.....
You see gerrard is feeling quite well in every other way i.e. eating well, sleeping well; a bit of pain but as he says, manageable; mentally fantastic; still going into work everyday this week for 3-4 hours and last weekend his work had an exhibition so he did 2 full days!!! He does all of this with minimal impact on his physical well-being.....of course he is quite fatigued by the end of the evening but from what I have seen that he packs into his day, well, even I was fatigued by the end of the evening!!!!
So in saying this, I can understand his struggle; it is not with dying.....it is being told you are dying and that there is only pallative treatment now for him while he is feeling both relatively physically and mentally well......his fear with starting chemo now, is that while he is feeling quite well and then has the chemo that a) there is no guarrantee of a positive response as they believe him to be chemo refractory... b) that the side effects could end him up in hospital which would then mean the end of any more treatment and possibly the end of his general well-being.....i.e. a further and more rapid decline downward.......with also having to recognise that in holding off on the chemo, he also could go downhill where possibly it could be too late for chemo or as his onc put it, miss the boat.....His onc and him decided to wait another week and see how he was going, if symtoms get worse (his breathing has got a bit more laboured on exertion and is coughing up a slight amount of blood) during the next week then they will possibly go ahead.......
In saying all of this, Gerrard I and his lovely wife Irene had a wonderful time together, I feel so lucky and inspired to have him as my brother, he took me to some fabulous places and I truly got to see why he loves singapore so much, it's been his home for the last 12 years and he has a wonderful bunch of friends there....I have added a couple of pics of our time together hope I haven't rambled too much, just wanted to touch base....
Again thanx for thoughts and support for me thru all of this
Jenny
P.S. I arrived home a day and a half ago.....I found out thru Irene (Gerrard's wife) that gerrard was admitted to hospital.....they have done a brain scan and found two lesions there, one at the back of his skull, one at the front; where these are located, one affects his speech and the other affects his movement....this affected me big time as he had only just managed to get out of his wheelchair and begin walking (albeit with major effort) without relying on his chair at all!! I was so inspired and in awe of this......he has some swelling on the brain so the plan is to give him medication to relieve the swelling and then discuss with him the next steps....his wife Irene seems to think the gerrard will be back in australia middle of next week...
Sorry if this puts you on a downer, you guys have always been such a support, comfort, informative and very understanding group, thankyou tremendously for that....
The first picture is of gerrard and his wife irene; the second is of them both with a couple of their friends; the third is of me with my nephew, riley....we call him smiley riley because he can't help but put a smile on your face thanx again
Jenny
Sorry I haven't been in touch for quite a while; I have just arrived back from singapore after visiting with gerrard for 2 fabulous weeks......
Unfortunately gerrard lost use of his legs 2 weeks ago due to his tumour in his stomach (which is wrapped tightly around his spinal chord) growing and pressing on his sciatic nerve.....he has just finished 10 sessions of radiation and no longer needs a wheelchair to get around.....although he still needs a walking stick at the moment, his radio oncologist believes he should get about 90% of mobility back.....the doc said that the radiation will keep working for a further couple of weeks and is quite confident to see a drop in his hcg (currently at 300,000) over the next couple of weeks.....and should hold off on pallative chemo.....on the other hand his tc onc is saying he should really start pallative chemo straight away......so gerrard is feeling quite torn as what to do.....I told him only he could really make that decision and really feel for him in having to make such a hard decision.....
You see gerrard is feeling quite well in every other way i.e. eating well, sleeping well; a bit of pain but as he says, manageable; mentally fantastic; still going into work everyday this week for 3-4 hours and last weekend his work had an exhibition so he did 2 full days!!! He does all of this with minimal impact on his physical well-being.....of course he is quite fatigued by the end of the evening but from what I have seen that he packs into his day, well, even I was fatigued by the end of the evening!!!!
So in saying this, I can understand his struggle; it is not with dying.....it is being told you are dying and that there is only pallative treatment now for him while he is feeling both relatively physically and mentally well......his fear with starting chemo now, is that while he is feeling quite well and then has the chemo that a) there is no guarrantee of a positive response as they believe him to be chemo refractory... b) that the side effects could end him up in hospital which would then mean the end of any more treatment and possibly the end of his general well-being.....i.e. a further and more rapid decline downward.......with also having to recognise that in holding off on the chemo, he also could go downhill where possibly it could be too late for chemo or as his onc put it, miss the boat.....His onc and him decided to wait another week and see how he was going, if symtoms get worse (his breathing has got a bit more laboured on exertion and is coughing up a slight amount of blood) during the next week then they will possibly go ahead.......
In saying all of this, Gerrard I and his lovely wife Irene had a wonderful time together, I feel so lucky and inspired to have him as my brother, he took me to some fabulous places and I truly got to see why he loves singapore so much, it's been his home for the last 12 years and he has a wonderful bunch of friends there....I have added a couple of pics of our time together hope I haven't rambled too much, just wanted to touch base....
Again thanx for thoughts and support for me thru all of this
Jenny
P.S. I arrived home a day and a half ago.....I found out thru Irene (Gerrard's wife) that gerrard was admitted to hospital.....they have done a brain scan and found two lesions there, one at the back of his skull, one at the front; where these are located, one affects his speech and the other affects his movement....this affected me big time as he had only just managed to get out of his wheelchair and begin walking (albeit with major effort) without relying on his chair at all!! I was so inspired and in awe of this......he has some swelling on the brain so the plan is to give him medication to relieve the swelling and then discuss with him the next steps....his wife Irene seems to think the gerrard will be back in australia middle of next week...
Sorry if this puts you on a downer, you guys have always been such a support, comfort, informative and very understanding group, thankyou tremendously for that....
The first picture is of gerrard and his wife irene; the second is of them both with a couple of their friends; the third is of me with my nephew, riley....we call him smiley riley because he can't help but put a smile on your face
thanx againJenny
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